I was recently reading Jesus Calling and came across these words: When your mind spins with a multitude of thoughts, you cannot hear My voice. A mind preoccupied with planning pays homage to the idol of control.
I love my fair share of control. I believe that is one of the remnants of the curse, way back from Eve. However, when I stop and truly ponder my desire for control, I know that I would do a grand job of messing up His perfect plan and will for me. These words caused me to pause, to consider. In the structure of our home, the bulk of the day-to-day operations falls into my hands (tangent – have you seen that recent video looking for a Director of Operations?) I keep our household running. I like to know what is coming. I like to try to manage any and all possible fallout. I like to feel like I have an idea about what tomorrow will look like. And these are natural parts of being me, as wife, mom, friend. I was wired this way – feeling responsible for things that cross my path, loving an intact plan, and checking things off my list. However, what spoke to me was the idea of a “mind preoccupied” and a mind “spinning with a multitude of thoughts.” We’ve all been there. Consumed. I want to be consumed with one thing, and that is loving and knowing my Father. All else fades. All else is temporal.
My job as a wife and mom is important. I was reflecting this week that if the Lord chose to take one of my family members away suddenly, would I reflect back and be confident that I was the best wife and mom I could be? (Dare I say no?) I want to do my best to love and serve others, to reflect my Savior. I want to plan ahead and be intentional with each day I’m given. But I do not want to be buried by my obsession with planning, or losing my mind to worry. That is not where we are called to walk, we are called to trust our trustworthy God. To take our thoughts captive and to rest in His peace and provision. After all, a mind consumed with anything but Him is missing the mark. We settle for less when we settle for less than Him. He is our everything.