Glorious Weight of Communion

This year at the retreat, I had the honor of serving communion to our women on Sunday morning. In honesty, I will admit that too many times I simply grab a hold of the juice and cracker with a surface-felt gratitude for Christ’s death.  I am thankful, but not with my whole heart.  That morning though, something hit me.  As I looked into the first woman’s eyes and spoke the words “This is Christ’s body broken for you, and His blood poured out for you,” something in me burst forth.  As the women continued to line up to receive the elements, tears streamed my cheeks and I was continually hit with fresh waves of gratitude.
For each of us, He died.  He suffered.  He saved.
The scripture in Philippians 3 rang through my mind “to fellowship in His sufferings.”  And I couldn’t help but acknowledge that any suffering He has asked me to walk through pales in comparison to the suffering He endured. And He did so willingly.
This is Christ’s body broken for you, and His blood poured out for you.
For some, my tears may have seemed over the top. That didn’t bother me. I was having a true moment with my Savior.  I was overwhelmed by gratitude, and as I looked upon each woman approaching the table, that gratitude grew. I felt the weight of His sacrifice. I may never have experienced that same depth of emotion with communion before.  Things can become so rote, so routine, that we miss the incredible price that was paid on our behalf.
In 1000 Gifts, Ann Voskamp continually circles the truth of eucharisteo – communion – the thankfulness at the core of Christianity.  She writes “…remembering with thanks is what causes us to trust – to really believe… It’s only when you live the prayer of thanksgiving that you live the power of trusting God…” I was flooded with gratitude at His gruesome, humble death. Not only does it tell of His love for us, but also to His obedience to His heavenly Father.  He is trustworthy.  He has already proven Himself.  So looking forward, where things can appear fairly hazy, I know I can trust, because I know He is good.
This is Christ’s body broken for you, and His blood poured out for you.
I wept with thanksgiving for the women I consider sisters in Christ.  I wept for the price that was paid on their behalf.  I wept that He went to that cross knowing the depth of our sin and pride.  He accepted His suffering because He loves us. And He knows us better than we know ourselves, and He still loves us.  He loves with perfect love.  And that love casts out all fear.
He is trustworthy.  He is good.  He is making us whole, and covering our continual sin, and interceding on our behalf.
I can only hope that next time the plates are passed to me, I would reflect back upon the sweet moment I had that morning.  I pray communion never feels the same.
This is Christ’s body broken for you, and His blood poured out for you.

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